In times when things are working out well for you, just about any person can maintain a calm attitude and appear reasonable and polite.
Character truly emerges in situations when there is no reward for a good behavior and no real punishment for acting badly.
For that reason, ordinary, everyday situations say a lot more about people than grand gestures.
A person may donate a lot of money to a charity publicly, but in front of the very same audience they could treat a waiter horribly. They might share some very profound quotes on social media platforms while backstabbing their close acquaintances.
What is most important is not how the individual behaves when they know they are on display, but when nobody’s watching.
The first sign: How they treat people with no power
There is hardly a more telling sign regarding somebody’s personality than how they behave toward people who have nothing to give back, people unable to help them either advance in their career, improve their social standing, or provide any benefit for them.
Take the waiter at the restaurant, the janitor at the workplace, the cashier at the supermarket, the secretary, or that old neighbor down the road. Such people have no influence whatsoever on the other person’s life.
A person showing kindness and respect toward these people almost always demonstrates authentic empathy rather than trying to create an image of kindness and courtesy. Multiple studies confirm the link between empathy and prosocial behavior, cooperation, and low aggression. People whose natural concern is how others feel act kindly without fail and do not mind that no one is watching them.
On the other hand, take note of any time they become abrupt and condescending toward those they see as lesser.
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